twenty seventeen

Be at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let every new year find you a better man.

—Benjamin Franklin

I was never known as a man who has successfully and strictly follow structured goals and listed resolutions. Kaya siguro my past 30 years have been pretty much about estimates, shrugs, and winging it. Sometimes it’s cool. A lot of times, it’s not. And it sucked.

So how about a little change in approach this new year?

Nothing long and unrealistic, though. No. Actually I’m just gonna shorten my list to three points:

  • Communication. Be straightforward. Be more expressive. Take photos everyday. Blog every fucking day. Say something wise and thoughtful as necessary. Be responsible to shut up when the situation calls for it. Say no when I have to.
  • Consistency. Consistently continue what I have started – getting healthier (such cliché!), being on-time (yep, it has happened!), being more productive at work. Never being complacent. Never resorting to shortcuts.
  • Commitment. Discipline. Sticking to a helpful routine. Discipline. Striving for a more assertive resolution instead of just meeting halfway. Discipline. Following a strict budget (ugh, more cliché!). Discipline. Committing to love myself more. Discipline. Sharing the love with someone deserving. Fucking discipline.

I’ll be sure to look back to this page next year and see how I fared.

For now, I stink because I just got home from a run (cliché materialized).

Happy 2017, y’all!

Me out.



peachy love

Happy birthday, sweetie. At least one of us is married, yes?

If I ever remember your birthday, it could be of three things: (1) you’re family, (2) you’re a friend, or (3) I spent grade school and high school with you for a huge chunk of my life and it stuck in my head.

For this lady, though, it’s a bit special. We were classmates since fourth grade. I had a huge crush on her even before I hit puberty. For half of my high school years, my idea of love revolved around her.

I’d be cautious, though, to call her my first love. But I did feel strongly about her. I’ll hang out with her crowd when I can. I’d do assignments for her. I think of her when I hear love songs. Heck, I’ll listen to Westlife for her. I’d get anxiety attacks of what I would say is jealousy, when other guys talk to her.

I’d be cautious to call her my first love for a lot of reasons. For one, my concept of love stems straight out of a simple crush. My concept of love is mainly what I see on TV. My concept of love revolves around her, but not so much about me. My concept of love is incomplete, and I’m self-aware of that.

In between summers and school years I stopped pursuing her. Looking back, I didn’t really think I did. I my have lacked declaration, passion, ownership. We’re in the same class and we were casual and we got to hang out, but there’s nothing cheesy or sensual or magnetic anymore.

Happy birthday, Peach. You’ve got an adorable family of your own now. I would’ve said you’re the cutest accountant/accounting person I’ve known, but given my life choices now I know that’s not true.

If anything, thanks for making a young boy feel. It’s a jump-start to a great feeling that, years later, I would still have no idea about.

I hope you got what you wished for on your birthday. I hope you get to spend many more.

True love looks good on you. At least, isa sa atin alam na what love really is about.

I guess, for now, that’s good enough.

part deux

Not everyone is slated for sequels. And you know it, not all sequels are awesome.

I quote myself tonight, while reminding myself at the same time that second chances are tricky.

Tricky when you ask for it. Tricky when you’re being asked for it. Tricky when it’s being handed to you.

In yet another paradox brought to us by Life, we are always expected to do things right. Nail them the first time. Yet, we are told that to err is human. We are consoled by the fact that if we miss, we sin, we do wrong, we apologize and learn and do it right the next time.

The next fucking time. Bawi bawi din pag may time, so goes every jeje line yes?

This crazy game of life and chances can’t always be won, but in the end, I guess what’s important is that we do what we do without any regrets.

Kung ibibigay mo, hihingin mo, ipagkakait mo, o kukunin mo ang bawat pagkakataon, sana ibibigay, hihingin, ipagkakait, o kukunin mo nang walang pagsisi, o duda, o alinlangan. At may paninindigan.

luh niña

If we start now, we will achieve La Niña.

— Bellatrix Tan, Miss Zamboanga
Miss Philippines Earth 2016 pageant

I think it goes without saying that this quote from the now infamous beauty queen from Zamboanga owned the day.

I doubt (and also hope I’m right in thinking) that she doesn’t know what La Niña. I think she got too overconfident. Her thought process was expected but the execution, well, we know what happened there.

This one’s yet another example of why we shouldn’t rush things. Think things over. It doesn’t really hurt to take time. And be very careful at that.

Caution is equally important. I mean, Pilipinas nga 400 na taon halos nasakop ng mga Kastila. Hindi naman sila nagmadali pero pagkalaya nila, nasakop din naman ng Amerikano.

Ayun makahugot lang na may Independence Day relevance. Sayang eh.

Just go with it, please?

hair fail

Dapat habang bata ka pa, inaayos mo yung buhok mo. Sayang naman. Sige ka pagtanda mo manghihinayang ka nung kabataan mo di mo inaayos buhok mo… 

— Christina, stylist, David’s Salon BGC

Apparently one can not have enough regrets in life.

Pati buhok mo isusumbat ang bawat nasayang na oras.

It hurts how much sense it makes.

Sige na gigising na nang maaga para lang makapag-wax.